Things start off at the hutch where David is offended that Nick treats him like a thick kid and, simultaneously, fails to understand the concept of irony.
Gail is still bitter that Becky has got the bar job ahead of her. Not that you could tell by her face, it always looks like that. She later suggests that a trained monkey could do the job, presumably why she didn't get it as ferrets are not monkeys.
In the corner shop, Dev speaks far to quickly for his own good while Sunita's high horse appears to be on stilts. Dev raises the suggestion about arranging Amber to move into Tina's flat by pricing Tina out of the room. The sly dog.
In the most pointless scene of the episode, the reptilian ladyman Marc moves in with Audrey, presumably because his brother, Nicholas Lyndhurst, doesn't have a spare room.
Returning to a proper plot and Becky talks her way into starting her job earlier by guilt tripping Nick and, mainly, (again) looking quite fit. Her first customers are, completely unpredictably, Kylie and Rat-Boy, who promptly rub Becky's nose in it about it being highly likely that Max will not be put up for adoption and, therefore, will be punished further by being made to live with the Platts.
Meanwhile, Audrey asks Maria if she thinks the duo can run the salon, to give her more time with the bloke from Butterflies. Maria gives a long-winded answer that means 'yes', demonstrating that, if you are a right shit and need a character reference for a court hearing, you might be wanting to give her a ring.
Back in the bar, Nick chucks Kylie and David. Mainly, this is because of Kylie's insulting of Becky but partially because pets are not allowed and David is, well, a rat.
Cindy Beale tells Tina that she'll try and find some extra shifts for her, to cover her rent hike, just before Tyrone drops Dev in it. Tina tells him he can stick his flat and Sunita manages to make her high horse, on stilts, stand on its tiptoes. Tyrone then invited Tina to move in with him and Tommy, much to the cocky sex pest's delight.
At some party or other, Chris goes into a bit of a radge for no reason - making him an angry clumsy tit - and shouts at Lloyd, who's taking time out from presenting his funk and soul show on BBC 6 Music and his job on a inter-planetary mining ship. Maria then has a go at Chris for being moody. (Really, someone should bring John Stape back, just so he can teach them all the meaning of the word 'irony'.)
In the bar, again, Nick comforts a vulnerable and weepy Becky. Obviously, men, the best way to comfort any clearly emotionally distressed woman is to do what Nick does and ram your tongue down her throat for a spot of tonsil hockey.
And, on that piece of advice on chivalry, we end.
Coronation Street is next on our tellybox tomorrow night at 7.30 and 8.30. Yes, that's twice. You jammy beggars.
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